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I have been on my midsoles for about 10 years. Then Larry had to try it. The only way he could catch me.

I never have a problem with my muscles or my bladder, and I am 55. I think it is because my lungs won't let me make enough watts. So, a reason to be glad to have COPD.

I agree with jond. I should stop shooting my mouth off. British police are unarmed. There are specialist firearms teams with their guns in a strong-box in the car.

Man in the middle of cycle race wants a drink. Man grabs wrong cylindrical object from wrong cage. Man blows his brains out. You could mount it on the boom of a Cruzbike and look over the top of it like the Red Baron. The wireless gear trigger can have a fire button.

Cyclists who shoot. Shootists who ride. Drivers - be polite!

That is why you won the competition.

With my lungs I am never going to get any KOM, but even I am slowed down by traffic. And traffic lights. One day I am going to go through a red and get run over and it will be entirely my fault. Red light - red mist. And on the track you are less likely to hit a hole.

Not hearses this time, but horses. And carts. And that is plural, not singular. A bloody enormous peloton of them. This is a long steep hill on which I have done 40mph in the past. So there I was, doing 6mph. So I overtook. I had just enough space between them and the oncoming traffic. I...

He was looking at my bike. He asked me "Ith it thafe?" I asked him what hapenned to his teeth. "I went over my handlebarth and thaw thtarth." He was disqualified from asking me if it is safe. The usual scenario.

Disabled? No, apart from the bladder problem. I had to make a comment of some kind, what with my username.

At least it wasn't Walter Matthau.

Did Stan Lee write this? Mild-mannered ed72 on a Chinese MTB gets passed by an investment banker on a carbon Trek. Mild-mannered ed72 disappears into the back of a van, from which emerges... Superbikeman! Faster than a speeding Froome on dope! Is it a bird? Is it a plane?

You have the XX1 driver body, which is what I have. I have a 42-10 cog and a 40t ring. I do not spin out at 40mph. On those rare occasions. With your double clangers, as we used to call them, you will be good for 50mph. If you can find a long steep downer. Turn round and try to get back up...

After 5 minutes on a DF the elbow starts to hurt, so no more UCI races, but Lords made a rule just for me.

Jolly convenient to have Jeeves to pick you up when the bally thing gets a puncture.

I feel sorry for your back wheel.

I actually had a good idea! I know more about material science than I think I do.

Eat more pies.

I read that candlewax cracks and flakes off. I had a full bottle of vaseline so that went in the mix. It probably all evaporated. But it is such a quick, clean process go remove the chain and drop it in the fryer. When I can hear the chain I do it. I give my earwax to the cat. She really...

The hand-position is ergonomic. I like that. What I do not like are the mis-shifts, and the time it takes to shift, bit it is no worse than the Sachs Huret I had on the Claud Butler. When I got the Grasshopper I decided I loved the Rohloff would never again submit to the ordeal of Disraeli...